Oscar Worthy?

There are times in a person's life that they just have to say something. You know what I am talking about? Those times where something is going on and you just have to speak your mind no matter how bad you don't want to get involved with it. There are plenty of examples of this. My usual tipping point is when some idiot at a bar or sporting event is rambling off incorrect information regarding one of the teams I love. At this point I usually roll my eyes and say something to the person next to me, but hopefully loud enough for all to hear. It mostly doesn't get any more heated than that, mostly. For other people, their tipping point is different and revolves around more nerdly issues. For instance, last night my buddy Reed texted me at 2 AM to ask if I was awake. Assuming, but knowing better, that it was something important, I told him I was awake. He then called me and proceeded to rant about how he bought an update for an XBOX 360 game, only to find that it would force him to perform somewhere around six more in-game achievements in order for him to have a perfect gamerscore for the game. This was very upsetting to Reed. Meanwhile, I listened wondering why he couldn't have just sent me a text, or not bothered to tell me at all. Ever. The point is, that there are certain things you encounter that you just have to give your two bits on, and I have encountered one and I just can't bit my tongue anymore. I am using this outlet as almost no one will see it.

Today, in my Professional Responsibility class, was being unprofessional and irresponsible by cruising the internet while trying to detract from any and all information that the professor was providing for us (Side note: I think I have made it well known on this site that anything before 10 AM is an ungodly hour meant for sleep). However, I came upon a CNN article (its the April 16, blog) that reports that Texas Governor Rick Perry wants Texas to secede from the Union over the bailout plan. Upon closer inspection, the Gov was at one of those stupid Tea Party things yesterday (Side note: I will not comment on the ludicrousness of these Tea Parties, such as the fact that the Boston Tea Party was based on taxation without representation, taxes were decreased this year, and that during a financial crisis Keynesian Economics, not trickle-down economics, are as money as Kobe in in the last two minutes of a basketball game. Again, I will not comment on these) says, "There there is absolutely no reason to dissolve [the Union], but" . . . if Washington continues its spending policies Texas should secede from the Union. Buddy, you cannot be serious.

Rick, let me give you a little history lesson that ranges from about 1861-1865. During that time, we tried this. It didn't work. In fact, it failed so miserably, that now secession is not only illegal, but treasonous. Now, I know that Rick was likely just trying to rally the crowd, but there are people that listen to idiots like him, and they believe what he says. Somehow they will think that Texas should, indeed, secede from the Union. Now, casting aside all the economic failure that would likely follow secession, I starting thinking about how political tactics like this exist on both sides of the political spectrum. When Reps were in power, it was unpatriotic to protest the war, when Dems are in power its unpatriotic to not protest the bailouts. As my head nearly exploded, it finally made sense to me. And now I will explain it to you--armed with the most powerful weapon in the English language: the analogy.

Politics in this country are like a Hollywood movie, and the parties that run it are the directors of the film. Who you have running the film is very important regarding how the film turns out. For instance if the Nazi party was in charge, this guy on the right would be your director. See how this works? OK, lets move on to the meat of this analysis. In the case of the United States, lets let Micheal Bay represent Republicans. His movies are all explosions, special effects, and flags waving to electric guitar solos (i.e. Armageddon, Transformers). Now, let Wes Anderson represent the Democrats. His movies are all witty banter, structured stories, and insightful epiphanies (i.e. Life Aquatic, Royal Tenenbaums). On their own, each stands to be an OK movie to their respective audiences. Some might be better than others, but more than likely, Transformers 2 will not be nominated for an academy award. The Anderson/Democrat movies will stand a bit more of a chance to win an award because the Academy (Europe) likes that kind of stuff, but overall it will not blow your movie pants off, and would lose to a stronger nominee.

Obviously the great movies are the ones that take bits and pieces of either of these genres and combine them to create the blockbuster that makes you see it the movie five times while its in theatres. I'm talking about you Dark Knight and Saving Private Ryan. So to come back around full circle, I am trying to tell Washington that most of us have had enough of both parties using the same tactics and allowing simple minded Americans to follow the screams of cable TV pundits. Are the Republicans right? Sometimes. Are the Democrats right? Sometimes. But I don't want my government run like the movie Con Air, or like some flick where the actors might as well wear a sign stating that they are better than me.

Seriously guys, its time to realize that, much like Will Ferrell, you both have some really good ideas and some really bad ideas. Some really bad ideas.

I'm sorry this was ranty rather than comical, but I had to say something. Hopefully, the comedy returns sooner than later. I will try to keep this thing going and I am more than open to suggestions.

However, before I go I have to say that when I began this blog the Mavs were playing the Spurs in the playoffs, now that I am back the same match up will begin this weekend. I guess what I am trying to say is SUCK IT SAN ANTONIO!